Two months into the routine of weekly summaries, you know the drill.
**********
Monday– I got up early this morning so the movers could come and take everything I’d packed to storage. They came and made quick work of it. I didn’t have a lot of stuff and it was all packed on the truck within an hour.
After that I found I needed the distraction, so I focused a bit and got things done. I cleaned the flat and then went and got my nails done. That night I met my friend Hannah at Smut Slam. I love Smut Slam, a dirty storytelling community spoken word event. I’ve been attending for more than a year, more or less since it started, and I’ve only missed one event. I am not afraid of public speaking and it’s been fun to tell my stories about sex and my poly relationships.
Tonight, to my surprise, Camryn, the host of the event, started speaking about a “friend of Smut Slam” and how people make the community and this person was a big part of it… and then shocked me by calling MY name and asking me to come up front. I literally cried. It was so sweet and so amazing. She gave me a chance to “jump the line” and tell my last Berlin story in a place that makes me feel like “Norm” from cheers! (If you are in London, Edinburgh, Copenhagen, Cardiff and other locations- you should check it out! I promise you won’t be disappointed!)
https://www.facebook.com/SmutSlamInternational
Tuesday– Today is the last day in Berlin. I actually had quite a bit of energy and got right to cleaning and packing the last of my stuff into the suitcases. I felt so motivated and energetic, but it took a lot longer than I expected. I had plans to meet my girlfriends for one last coffee and lunch at my favorite cafe, so I was pressed for time. The apartment looked great when I was done, but I was still paranoid that my landlady wouldn’t give me back my deposit. I don’t know why I stress these kinds of things.
Anyway- lunch with the three of my friends was nice and relaxed. We enjoyed chatting and having our coffee and cake afterwards. I am going to miss them so much, so it was nice to have one last chat with all three of them together. They are all three so different, but I enjoy their company all the same.
Once I got back to the flat, I checked in with Stefan and he was ready to go home for the evening, so he came and got me at my flat. Usually I take the tram to him, but with my suitcases and backpack and all, he came to me. He parked the car on the corner and walked to my flat to help me carry everything. I know that seems to be an obvious thing a boyfriend would do, but it was so difficult for me to ask him to help me in that way. We don’t really have a traditional “do things for each other” or “do things together,” relationship- so it’s not the way we usually support each other. But as I’ve mentioned here before, I have been learning so much about what our relationship really is like over the past month or so, and this was something he didn’t even think twice about. I asked for his help and he was there, no problem at all. <3

I am considering how to write about our last night together. It was full of our normal routines, eating, smoking, chatting with him while he was in the bath. (Only this time I was going through the bag of sex toys he was storing improperly and threw away the ones that are crappy and melting together and washed the rest and played them neatly away and ready for use- while we talked and he bathed.) We also had some of the most intense sexual experiences yet- totally Sex Scientist story stuff- but also maybe not because- good lord! I had a hard-enough time taking about fisting when I started this blog, how am I going to talk about anal fisting?? Plus- holy intense! (And good lord, messy! LOL THAT is something we don’t talk about enough in our writings, how messy sex can be!)

Wednesday– We had gotten busy early last night, therefore we slept early, which was good because we had to get up so early this morning. I am glad we did though because one of my favorite things is snuggling with him in the morning while we slowly wake up, drink our coffee, and chat. I thought we were going to miss out on that, but we were able to enjoy that too. It made the leaving easier for being slow and more like our normal routine.
At the airport, I got a nice long hug good bye. He was sweet and reminded me that I am off on an adventure and should be excited, and to let him know when I arrived safely at the other end, and off he went! He did hop up on the door of the van to look over and wave and yell goodbye too… so sweet!
The flight to Edinburgh was easy, a short delay in Berlin but all good. I met my friend Alistair at his office, and he got us home safely. I will be staying with him for a few weeks. He is one of my best friends in the world and a totally safe place for me to land and get used to being out in the world as a nomad again! He made me liver and onions for dinner, we drank three bottles of wine and I was out like a light on the couch early!

Thursday– Found a sweet little cafe to work in and got a lot done. I needed to work since I took most of the rest of the week off for moving. Again, Alistair made us a yummy dinner and we spent the evening listening to music, chatting and playing some Fluxx. And of course, wine. Lovely day, relaxed and exactly what I needed.
Friday– I did not go out of the flat until late afternoon when I went to meet A at his office to catch the train to Glasgow. We are heading to meet his friend and hang out there, sight see, drink, eat, chat. The usual! I drank a bottle of wine on the train, in like 45 minutes! I hadn’t really eaten anything all day, this was not a good combination.
We had dinner at his friend L’s house, but I didn’t eat much, drank more and apparently was “man handling” her adorable (grown man) nephew. Thankfully I took myself off to bed early and no harm was done to anyone! (Except I have a small scratch on my forehead that I have no idea how I got, it’s almost like a rug burn, and my nose hurts a bit, so I wonder if I tripped or something. EEK! Not good!)
Saturday– A full day of walking about Glasgow, taking in the sights, enjoying good food and the Wales/ England rugby match. A is from Wales so… it had to be done. I enjoyed it, and thankfully wasn’t too hungover.
We came back to L’s house and ordered curry and hung out playing more Fluxx, listening to more music, and talking… so much talking!
Sunday– We totally had a lie in and relaxed. Then L made us a “Scottish salad”- Brunch. It was amazing, and relaxed. We simply sat around, talked, and enjoyed each other’s company until it was time for A and me to catch the rain back to Edinburgh. I definitely needed a relaxing chill day. I had a few moments of feeling emotional and sad about not being in Berlin and missing my friends and loves, so this was a nice way to be distracted.

Totals:
- 2 nights in Berlin
- 1 night with my love Stefan
- 1 night of amazing wild sex
- 2 nights in Edinburgh
- 2 nights in Glasgow
- Too many bottles of wine
- 1 very good old friend
- 1 new friend
- 2 train rides
- Too many moments of being sad
Feeling a bit depressed and sad, and not really in the mood to write, but I have to get working on my Smut Marathon entry. I didn’t work on it last week because things were so crazy with moving. I am glad to be here at A’s, he’s a good friend and a good chap, he is a big help to my missing my tribe in Berlin.
Also- I decided to be celibate while I am here in Edinburgh, so no sexy dates to distract me. I need to feel what I feel, not use sexy times as a numbing force. I want to know how it feels to love Benjamin and Stefan from afar and figure out how to be poly without my partners. So, we’ll see how it goes! Hopefully next week’s update, while it won’t be a sexy one, won’t be as much of a downer as this one.
**********
Adding this to Wicked Wednesday! Check out this week’s prompt for some true smutty goodness! I’ll be back with delicious smut soon! I promise!
Wow! That’s what i have to say – i know Scotland – this is a massive journey u are telling us about – get your SM entry sorted! x (thanks for supporting my posts)
<3 It is an adventure for sure... Still more to come! (Set my SM entry today! Phew!) And it's easy to support your awesome work and you support us all so much- it works!!
I love that you are embracing life even when it’s tough and challenging. I applaud your decision to not let sex distract you (know that one). But oh you made me hungry again for another adventure… You go grrl!
And yes, sex, messy, anal sex messier, even with a toy let alone fisting – wow. But we are often to ready to deny the carnality of our bodies. Well said.
Indie xx
Thanks for reading! My whole life is one grand adventure when I can make it that way! And I seriously am considering writing about the messiness… we’ll see if I am brave enough.
This must’ve been quite a week of emotions seeing all the changes that are happening! Thanks for sharing your world with us.
Rebel xox
It’s been tough. If I let myself think too much I cry. It will get better.